As I watched overtime of Game 7 between the Florida Panthers & Boston Bruins, I found myself bored.
Who the hell wants to sit through that shit?
The rules of hockey need a complete overhaul.
I’m obviously kidding.
Game 7 OT playoff hockey is the best theatre in sports.
At least for my money it is.
However, I turned on ‘Get Up!
With Mike Greenberg’ this morning (for some reason).
Greenie’s bad ideas were a cornerstone of ESPN Radio.
I don’t think that’s actually true, but in my mind Icreditblame him for it.
I don’t actually want the NHL to implement these rules.
That would be ridiculous.
Consider this blog to be a thought experiment.
I did some extensive research (i.e.
That’s not high enough.
Let’s get that closer to 4%.
Watching teams adapt to this new rule would be fascinating.
Obviously teams would start by pulling the goalie a little earlier.
More goals would be scored at the end of games.
But eventually, someone will get crazy and pull their goalie on a power play in the second period.
Imagine a 7-on-3 power play?
Would that just be an automatic goal?
Or would 2 additional skaters not even be that helpful?
There’s only 1 puck after all.
There’s only so much ice.
Would 7 players just just clog up the power play?
I’m not sure how it would affect the game, but I would like to find out.
The 5-minute, 3-on-3 OT’s are wonderful.
The players have so much open ice to work with.
The action is back and forth, teams create chance after chance.
Goals are scored much more frequently.
Why not do that for a full 60 minutes?
Ignore the fact that we would be eliminating jobs for half of the league.
We’ll give those players a severance package or something.
With those facts ignored, hear me out.
One of hockey’s problems is that they don’t have a ton of front facing stars.
Even when you do watch the stars play, they don’t always stick out to the untrained eye.
Everyone looks relatively the same in uniform, and you might’t see anyone’s faces.
But with only 3 skaters per team, the stars will truly be able to shine.
Fans will get to know the players better (because there would not be as many of them).
Lacrosse is the sport of the future after all.
No Overtime Clock (Golden Goal, No Shootout)This rule I actually believe in.
Shootouts never make sense.
The game isn’t played as a series of breakaways, and it shouldn’t be decided that way.
They’ve already cut overtime down to 3-on-3.
When you play 3-on-3, there’s going to be a goal scored soon enough.
Just let them play until someone puts one in the back of the net.
That’s a much more legitimate way to decide a game.
No OffsidesWhat has offsides ever done for anyone?
Let’s stretch out that ice.
The offensive zone would be changed forever, as the defensemen wouldn’t have a blue line to hold.
Teams could reset the puck all the way back to center ice without having to dump the zone.
Maybe it wouldn’t.
I have no idea how it would look, but it would be interesting to watch teams adapt.
Eliminate CheckingJust in case anybody thinks these ideas are good, I propose we get rid of checking entirely.
I’ve played hockey my whole life, and checking is the worst.
I don’t want to be hit.
It hurts to get hit.
Turn the NHL into adult league hockey.
Adult league hockey is the best.
Bottom line is, eliminating checking would benefit the skilled players.
The skilled players are the most fun players to watch.
I want to see a league exclusively catered to them.
Glass DomeNo more pucks out of play.
I want a full glass dome built over the playing surface.
Cut down on play stoppages.
No Glass At AllOr we could do the polar opposite of a glass dome.
Get rid of the glass entirely so it’s only boards surrounding the ice.
I don’t want any nets protecting the fans either.
Expose the fans to flying pucks.
Imagine the adrenaline rush of sitting directly behind the goal.
Every time a player winds up to shoot, it could be the last thing you see.
The prices of tickets would drop, as nobody would want to sit in the highly dangerous seats.
But the brave people who are willing to sit there would get a wild experience for an affordable price.
And they’ll have an increased chance of going home with a souvenir.
Imagine a fan getting an assist from the stands?
That’s pretty cool.
That’s all I got.
I can understand why Greenie likes doing these so much.
They’re very fun.
You don’t even have to credit me for it.
I just want to see them implemented somewhere.
We’ve seen how successful the Savannah Bananas' are.
The baseball minor league with all of the weird quirky rules that I don’t understand.
It’s all very stupid, but the Savannah Bananas are sold out for the next year.
People eat that shit up.
I guarantee there’s an audience for the hockey version of that as well.
