The human body is miraculous.
Just take the immune system for example.
This adapts to pathogens and viruses, learning how they operate, and changing itself to deal with them.
Because Im an optimist, this is how I choose to believe computers work too.
Getting a virus or malware on your machine wont damage it long-term, instead itll make it stronger.
And thats better than a fact, thats abelief.
This is why youve got to ensure your Mac is brimming with the most vicious and nefarious malware around.
The question is this: how do you make that happen?
What do you have to do to ensure your gear is sicker than a skater in the 90s?
Luckily for you, were here to help you out.
Always download cracked versions of software
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Not one teensy, tiny bit.
Never, ever upgrade your current software
Change is scary.
Change means having to confront difficult, new things.
Im shivering in fear just thinking about it.
This goes for software too.
Really, what need is there to upgrade your machines version of macOS?
Or any other bit of software, really?
And, again, I like to think people and computers are the same thing.
Yeah, maybe you mistyped Facebook so youre on Faecbok instead, thats fine.
Actually, thats more than fine, thatsperfect.
And I mean, whatever.
NOT ANYMORE, PAL!
You also get bonus points every time you download a piece of software and successfully install it.
Thats a really fantastic way to hoover up as many viruses as possible.
I understand this may be tough to adapt to, so I have some advice.
To begin with, to truly thrive in this new world, you need a positive mental attitude.
Never, EVER, question the insane promises the dodgy software is making you.
Believe it all, let its gentle reassurance wash over you.
Yes, this app will help you find love.
Indeed, this other piece of software can help you lose weight and gain muscle.
Of course this download is going to help you earn thousands of dollars a month.
You know how the very best, purest water in the world comes straight from the source?
Where it rises from springs?
Well, public Wi-Fi is exactly the same.
You dont want to use and of these personal and protected networks.
Then, friend, you should do as many sensitive tasks as you’ve got the option to.
Those issues your Macs having?
Really, theyre fine.
If youve been following all the tips above, youll start to notice it on your machine.
Maybe itll slow down.
Maybe itll make a lot of noise.
Maybe therell be weird pop-ups and apps opening all over the place.
Maybe macOS will warn you about vulnerabilities Dont be worried though: this is exactly what youre looking for.
In fact, dont actually do anything to solve this, let it run its natural course.
Were doing thisforyour Mac, it has to learn.
Whatever you do, dont download antivirus software
Were here to make your setup stronger, right?
So why bother with antivirus or antimalware software?
Let your lovely Mac bubble under the heat.
Good luck, friends.
Im rooting for you.
