Welcome back to another episode of Dumping Them Out.
I’ve officially been the world’s biggest Arizona Diamondbacks fan for 19 days now.
I spent $50 on a flat bill hat that doesn’t fit my head to make it official.
It’s been a hell of a ride.
I’ve learned a lot of cool things about the team.
Like if you turn their logo sideways it makes the head of a snake.
They do fun different brightly colored arm sleeves every game.
They have a pool in the stands.
Their mascot is a bobcat.
I’ve even learned some of the players names.
The dynamic between Phillies fans and Diamondbacks fans on the internet is my favorite thing right now.
The general vibes I get from Diamondbacks' fans are, “Oh wow!
We made this NLCS!
This should be a fun week of watching baseball!”
throw in of attitude.
It’s maybe the funniest mismatch of fan bases I’ve ever seen.
It’s a very cool truck.
Obviously, anybody would rather have a truck than not have a truck.
It’s literally a giant sign that says, “Hey look I’m a football player.”
Don’t even think about smoking a joint in that thing.
Or going out past curfew.
It almost seems like the whole thing is a way for Utah’s coaches to track their players.
Speaking of NIL, I just learned something the other day that I couldn’t believe was true.
Something about their student visas don’t allow for it.
They can get regular jobs, like if they want to work in the school book store or something.
But there’s some stupid rule that says they can’t make any NIL money.
That seems really shitty.
They’ve been the same team for as long as I can remember.
High school level offense.
They’ll end up ranked in the Top 15, maybe Top 10.
But records don’t lie.
Offense is only 1/3rd of the game, and Iowa does the other 2/3rds as well as anyone.
It’s a hilarious thing to watch play out every season.
But yesterday the Big 10 refs robbed us of the most perfect Iowa moment ever.
The game was just like any Iowa game.
Offense does nothing to help out the team.
Zero ball movement all game long.
They even did a horribly pathetic punt from midfield with 2 minutes left in the game.
But of course, their defense got Minnesota to go 3-and-out and punt the ball back.
Honestly, Iowa’s ONLY chance of winning that game was if they returned the punt.
Their offense was never going to move the ball more than 0 yards on that drive.
And the returner fucking did it.
He returned the kick.
The hilarious Iowa season was alive.
But the fucking ref just HAD to call whatever that stupid fair catch rule was.
I guess the returner did kind of wave his left arm?
But whether the refs were right or not, I hated that call.
We deserved an Iowa vs Ohio State (or Michigan) Big 10 championship game.
Shame on your refs.
