It took us 86 years, but we finally returned the favor by sending them the 2023 Patriots.
–This one was yet another reminder of how good we had it not all that long ago.
These international game used to be a blast.
Back then, the Patriots were true ambassadors of the game.
Bringing the finest example of tackle football to the world.
The Raiders meanwhile, practiced all week in Oakland, at sea level.
And the game was over before kickoff.
It was the NFL presenting our culture at its very best.
Cold cuts for breakfast.
Friendly, bosomy Teutonicmadchencarrying preposterously large tankards of Oktoberfest beer.
Schopenhauer droning on about the will as a blind, unconscious, aimless striving, devoid of knowledge.
Hegel’s dreary dialectics, the contradictory process between opposing sides.
–With that preamble out of the way, it’s time we have a talk about Mac Jones.
We can’t put it off any longer.
There’s been a lot going on here that is beyond his control.
He was under duress for most of the game.
(Too soon?)
But two things can be true at the same time.
A lot of this can be not his fault while much of it very much is.
–Simply put, Jones is shook.
Just look as this broken man:
–It’s not like he’s weak or lacks mental toughness.
This isn’t a character flaw.
It’s just that for now, Jones is not equipped to be the QB1 on this team.
At this point, keeping Jones on the bench would be a mercy.
Both to him and to the organization.
Respected by his men and his commanding officers.
Right now, Jones is no good to us.
He needs to be sent away from the front lines until he can get himself right.
And not be further damaged in what is already a lost cause.
There were other various missed opportunities.
None as long as 15.
This shouldn’t exist in a modern NFL offense.
–Before we move onto other topics thought, it’s worth revisiting the big one.
Play action out of 12 personnel.
Ezekiel Elliot stayed home in pass protection before releasing into the flat.
Shaquille Leonard was spying him.
But was nowhere near getting back to Mike Gesicki’s area as he came free on a corner route.
Jones had a clean pocket.
He simply didn’t step into it.
The classic front foot throw of a QB who’s taken one too many hits.
Ted Lasso put more onthe dart toss he beat Rupert with.
But it shouldn’t be.
I can’t ever remember such a schizophrenic game from any unit.
In the passing game, they were Bruce Banner.
I can’t recall a single time the Colts had to send an extra rusher.
But in the running game, they went full Hulk.
But whoever first started saying that never saw the 2023 New England Patriots.
Now we should never have to hear it again.
–This seems like as good a segue as any to transition to the Patriots defense.
Specifically, how it is utterly incapable of generating pressure unless it sends extra rushers.
Josh Uche took 17 snaps buthe’s basically an NPCat this point.
So as a result, the best they could do was put Gardner Minshew in a box.
Rather flimsy ones at that.
Like when the Amazon guy leaves it on the steps without a plastic bag and it rains.
Because Minshew tore through the carboard with minimal effort.
Together they’re able to do something that is impossible in our little corner of the world.
–Here’s another example, from the Colts touchdown drive.
Another 4-man rush, but with Mack Wilson at LDE.
The zone he patrols is the Field of Dreams.
It’s where quarterback incentive bonuses come true.
He’s a mortal lock to win the Man of the Year Award from Drew Rosenhaus' agency.
Still, he was third in snaps among the cornerbacks with 41.
And at this point, it’s inexplicable.
–Let’s stick with the coaching, because there’s some explaining to do.
But what do I know about such high level strategic thinking?
But that again, is just conventional wisdom at work.
Next-level thinkers try a wide receiver screen.
Genius is hard for us lay people to understand.
–Here’s our probable new QB1.
Clearly his Fake Spike game could use some refinement.
Music that perfectly pandered to the tastes of an overwhelmingly New England Boomer audience.
More crowd noise than we’ve heard in Gillette all year.
But that day doesn’t seem to be coming any time soon.
Then crashed and burned before our very eyes.
Oh, the humanity.
