Welcome back to another episode of Blog Wheel.
Once again, for no particular reason, I am profiling a complete stranger from Twitter.
This particular stranger goes by the name of Cheapie13 (@Cheapie13).
Profiling a stranger from Twitter is always a roll of the dice.
There are a lot of bad strangers on the internet (i.e.
Don’t Fuck With Cats, To Catch A Predator, etc.).
What if Cheapie13 is a murderer?
People get away with murder every day.
Only 51% of homicides in the United States are solved.
That being said, it’s extremely important to thoroughly vet your strangers before profiling them in a blog.
Looks like we’re in the clear.
Anyways, Cheapie13 is a small obese cartoon rabbit who has never murdered anyone.
Despite being a fictional rabbit, Cheapie13 has managed to amass 4,633 followers on Twitter.
According to the most readily available data, the average following on Twitter is 707 followers.
So statistically speaking, Cheapie13 has a large Twitter following.
Cheapie13 was kind enough to supply me with some facts about himself.
They were awesome facts.
I don’t want to come across as unappreciative of the facts that he provided me.
But I did take the liberty of adding a few made up facts of my own.
It’s up to you to identify which facts are real.
Fact #1: Is From MinnesotaMinnesota.
The Land of 10,000 Lakes.
The birthplace of hockey.
Home of Garrison Keillor.
Minnesota has long been a part of the United States.
That’s pretty cool.
Fact #3: Loves the VikingsThe Minnesota Vikings are historically a losing football franchise.
They are one of 12 teams to never win a Super Bowl.
He stores his blimps in a 20 acre blimp hanger located outside of Hibbing, Minnesota.
But he wouldn’t trade his blimps for the world.
The blimps have been in his family for generations.
He looks forward to passing the tremendous burden down to his children some day.
They argued over the last Krispy Kreme donut in the case.
After a brief struggle, he was able to wrestle the donut out of Tiger Wood’s hands.
Tiger Woods chased him to his car.
Tiger: “I’M TIGER WOODS, GIVE ME THAT DONUT!”
Cheapie13: “COME AND GET IT GOLF BOY!”
Cheapie13 got into his sports car and sped off down the windy streets of Los Angeles.
This was Atlantis' 33rd and final mission.
Fact #9: Brought Back The Pyrenean Ibex from ExtinctionIn 2003, Cheapie13 turned back time.
The baby ibex lived for only 7 miserable seconds, but it still counts.
It marked the first ever successful revival of an extinct species.
Fact #10: Ate an Entire AirplaneIn 2010, Cheapie13 purchased a decommissioned Boeing 737 from Malindo Air.
His original plan was to paint the plane, and make a piece of art for his blimp hangar.
But a few months into the project he got bored and wanted a new challenge.
He decided to eat the airplane.
Every day, he would chip off tiny pieces of the airplane and mix it in with his supper.
Cheapie13’s followers are known for ‘tapping in".
Along with the murder inquisition, I asked Cheapie13 4 additional questions as well.
Q & A’s with Twitter strangers are a crapshoot in their own right.
They’re going to go one of two ways.
Let’s see how Cheapie 13 handles these.
Turns out the ladies love big chungus.
I’m just now learning about Big Chungus.
He could have made an inappropriate Duke Lacrosse joke there, but he refrained.
I was going to have to cancel him if he did otherwise.
Luckily, he was able to limit himself to a wife’s boyfriend joke.
If the USA got rid of Minnesota tomorrow would anything change?Nothing would change.
Minnesota isnt bringing much to the table, but I still love it
Good answer.
State pride is bullshit.
Ive done it plenty of times in GTA 5 and its thrilling every time
Great answer.
Unless you really just want to know what it’s like to kill a guy.
We’ve already established that Cheapie13 is not a murderer.
It appears he does not have a desire to murder either.
But that could always change.
