Blue’s Clues was a show on Nickelodeon that ran from 1996-2006.
It was a show for children.
So that makes me the Steve of the show.
I thought I remembered Steve from Blue’s Clues doing something sketchy.
I thought he was dishonorably discharged from Nickelodeon.
But Steve is old news now.
I think I would be a great choice to host a 2023 Blue’s Clues reboot.
The host of Blue’s Clues is a detective of sorts.
Not to brag, but I do have some experience in that department.
Although Mintzy does have a lot of dog like features.
IfI were the host of Blue’s Clues, I would make some drastic changes.
First off, the ugly green striped shirt with a Bryan Colangelo collar would have to go.
Secondly, I would stop making Blue work and would treat him like a regular dog.
or “What does Blue want to do today?”
Those are just basic thoughts.
They’re not mystery worthy.
Plus, I’m not just going to let Blue decide what were doing everyday either.
You don’t ask a dog “What do you want want to do today?
“, and just go with whatever he says.
You know what dogs want to do?
They want to play in the street and eat chocolate.
I’m a better dog owner than that.
The entire premise of Blue’s Clues is both stupid and dangerous.
I want to give Blue a long, healthy life.
I don’t want to make it seem like I’m kicking Blue to the curb.
It’s the opposite of that.
I’ve giving Blue an early retirement.
Not even an early retirement.
He’s been retired since 2006.
I’m not making him go back to work after all these years.
Blue deserves to kick his paws up, and relax at home with the salt and pepper shakers.
Enter, McGruff The Crime Dog.
I know what you’re thinking, “But, John.
McGruff The Crime Dog is even older than Blue?
Doesn’t he deserve retirement as well?”
McGruff The Crime Dog doesn’t want to retire.
McGruff was put on this planet by Jimmy Carter in 1978 to keep crime off the streets.
You think he’s just going to relax at home while there are criminals a foot?
That’s not in his blood.
As long as McGruff has a working snout, he’ll be using it to sniff out crime.
But what types of mysteries will McGruff and I be solving?
I’m under the impression that I will have an extensive budget to work with.
So with my budget, I will hire Dick Wolf to be the show’s Executive Producer.
Dick Wolf is the greatest producer of our generation.
But make no mistake about it, Law & Order is elite programming.
More people in New York City are dead or wrongly imprisoned due to Detective Benson’s negligence.
McGruff is very serious, whereas Blue is very silly.
But despite their differences, a beautiful friendship will blossom.
Maybe they’re share a dog bed or something.
I guess that’s it.
It might take a little bit to catch on, considering the drastic change in target audience.
Fans of the original Blue’s Clues won’t be pleased.
But eventually the right people will find it and the show will be a big hit.
