This may be a terrible sketch, but I am going to use it for a blog.
It’s pretty enjoyable…
It was a tough race, but you won!
Bradford McKenzie:
Couldnt have done it without you John, by the way….
It’s not Bradford anymore it’s Mr. President!
And you cant blow me off as usual.
This is your first intelligence briefing.
Oh hey there John getting nasty again!
John do you understand I am about to mount the most comprehensive reform this country has ever seen!
I am going to go down with Washington, Lincoln, Roosevelt, or Obama!
The presidential briefer is here goddamn it!
O my god they do it this soon after?
Yes you bumbling imbecile!
Caesar has briefed everyone since Carter.
The Secret Service transported him here he’s in the conference room.
Brad enters the conference room to a stoic man sitting across the table
Hi there!
Sorry to keep you waiting!
Caesar:
Bradford take a seat.
Brad sits down still on top of the world and feeling untouchable.
Well, it’s great to finally meet you, Caesar.
We should skip the introductions.
We have the shortest but most important brief of your presidency.
O perfect haha, wait you are the guy who knows everything ahah!
Look if you don’t want to take this seriously.
No seriously, lemme have some fun I just got elected.
Alright ill answer your questions, but you better cooperate with what I am about to tell you.
Brad snickers, thinking he has one-upped the longtime presidential confidant
So E.T phone home?
The UFOs are advanced technology we reverse-engineered from a craft that crashlanded in Roswell.
The hominids onboard we are unsure of their source may be from far space or from far time.
We use that technology to defend against Nuclear attacks.
Brad was dumbfounded and completely enthralled
Wow… What about Big Foot?
Come on, I have plans to legislate that; tell me about Sasquatch.
There were small populations of surviving Gigantopithicus in the cave systems under national parks.
Teddy Roosevelt designated those areas parks to prevent friction between humans and the ancient beasts.
Franklin Roosevelt during the Great New Deal enlisted unemployed WW1 veterans to exterminate the majority of their populations.
Almost none are left with too small of a population to reproduce out of extinction.
Brads Curiosity causes him to lean forward in his chair
What about Mothman?
Caesar Continually looks impatient
myth
Brad gives a fair look
Denver Airport, wtf is going on there?
Probably the most relevant question you have asked.
That is your main destination in any event of an attack.
Bush was taken there immediately after 9/11.
Now can I begin your brief?!
Caesar begins to look more and more irate
Interesting, last question…. What happened to JFK?
Asked too many questions.
